“Little Soul, Little Flame” 2012 Digital Art by Chris Fleming
I lay in bed this morning. I didn’t sleep very well due to a head cold and the pain and aching in my head and neck all night. I couldn’t get comfortable at all, no matter what pillow I used or how I placed my head. I had some massage and cranial sacrum done yesterday with hopes to heal and help my head and neck injury from a car accident back in Sept of 09. Now that I am working out again at the gym, I am suffering from tension, headaches, and anxiety due to the tightening up of the neck and and shoulder muscles. Even with a muscle relaxer the pain tends to still breath through. I keep most of it in, but at times it is unbearable.
Holding my pillow I started thinking about some of my decisions over the past few years and how I wish I made some different choices. The things I miss, the mistakes I made, the pain I have gone through and even the things I lost. I started to get depressed from these thoughts and began to just wish I could go back home to heaven like I felt during an out of body experience many years ago and during a regression I had years ago where I met a woman ( many of you probably heard of her, she was a famous singer ) who showed me the connection with all things in heaven. The water, air, flowers, grass, and other spirits. Where we are all connected and there is a tone, a melody that flows through the air and all things, a tone so beautiful it sings praise to one and all and is beautifully honoring the creator, god. A flow of unconditional love that is so strong one only wants to bask in it and never leave. Even in this basking you are not alone as all creation is there with you singing this sweet, wonderful tone. Unlike anything I have ever heard.
All of a sudden my father popped into my head (he passed away over a year ago) and I felt his consciousness, I reached for my iphone and decided to check if a text message came through to see if I would be going to the Hawks game tonight or not, instead a program opened up on my phone with buttons and a menu I had never seen before, i tried to close out of it but it opened back up again and I noticed there was a play button. Instead of laying back down, I was compelled by it, so I decided to press it, and this beautiful song began.
Here is the song –
The Lyrics –
Miracle Eyes by Lesiem
Fire – once gave you life
now shines the light – to let you find your way
don‘t let it die – it brightens the dark
and burns your pain
O, Non Contra Venio, Non Lingua
O, Quid Ergo Anima, Flammula
Mecum Omnes Plangite, Emudolor
Divide Et Impera
Brevi Finietur
Fear – darken your day
fever turns cold –
when dreams and shadow play
the fire of life – burns deep in your soul
keep it warm
O, Non Contra Venio, Non Lingua
O, Quid Ergo Anima, Flammula
Mecum Omnes Plangite, Emudolor
Divide Et Impera
Brevi Finietur
—-
It hit me like a ton of bricks, as it played I felt my father, his love and his message in these words. Mind you, I didn’t hear “Fire – once gave you life” I heard, instead “I gave you life” and the rest…loving and motivational I felt strongly as tears streaked down my face, hope form above and from my father in what I feel was a message in a form from him and others. The meaning, to change my thoughts, not lose the fire in my soul, the drive and determination no matter what. Not to be afraid of success nor failure. But to push on and feel warmth in knowing I am not alone, actually scratch that, NEVER alone. Love from above, is always with us.
You see there have been points in my life where I have questioned things, as we all have done at times, and almost like clock work a song plays or comes on that answers my thoughts and makes me think a different way. Even in some dire cases, it has been as if someone was listening and responding through the music. Yes, I believe it is possible. Heaven hears us all the time, and at times they respond in ways that we will take notice.
Another song played afterwards that also had deep meaning for me, and I dont feel comfortable enough to share that one here. But I know what they are saying and I am listening.
Pay attention to things around you and when you ask, seek…..you will find “they” are listening. Who are “they”, you might ask, well, what is love? Who is love? What is heaven? Who do you love that is in heaven? There is your answer. I know it is mine.
So after hearing this and crying my eyes out, I got out of bed, decided to forget about the cold and the pain in my neck and start my day. I have things to do and someone above is telling me to get going. Some things are to important to worry about, some pains irrelevant to tasks at hand.
“the fire of life – burns deep in your soul
keep it warm”
and if you are wondering what does the latin chorus mean? I looked it up online with a translator. From Latin to English it means –
“Oh, On the other hand I have reached the not, not with the tongue
Oh, What, then, Little soul, little flames
everyone weep with me, Emudolor
Divide and will be finished shortly, ‘Reign over”
By the way As I have been typing this, the sunlight came through the clouds beaming into my window, into my home office, and onto my body, face and computer. Timing, as they say, is everything. Thank you god, thank you. I feel the warmth, it will get me through the day.
-Chris
